The Witch With the Glitch Read online

  Nina groaned to herself. “I should never have told them they were a rubbish mob,” she said to Oswald, who whined in agreement.

  “Come out and be burned at the stake!” a man shouted at the witch.

  “Don’t be daft,” the witch’s voice came from inside the house. “Why would I come out if you’re going to burn me at the stake?”

  There was a muttering in the crowd with no-one really knowing how to reply.

  “Good point,” the man shouted again. “Well, stay where you are. We’re going to burn your house down with you inside.”

  Izzy gave a pitiful meow from inside Nina’s coat but Nina was too busy whispering in Oswald’s ear to notice.

  “Right then!” the witch shouted back. “Give it your best try you great berk!”

  “Berk?” the man muttered. “I’ll show you.” In his hand he held a heavy branch with a rag dipped in oil wrapped around one end. He reached forward with the stick and touched one of the other villager’s torches; the rag instantly burst into flames. Once he was happy that it was burning well he pulled it back and then hurled it into the air, straight at the witch’s house.

  chapter fifteen - time is running out

  The burning torch cartwheeled towards the gingerbread house but Oswald was already bounding toward it. He moved like lightning, pouncing high into the air and, with a crunch, caught the stick in his mouth before it had a chance to hit the witch’s gingerbread house.

  He dropped the flaming stick in the grass and dragged it this way and that, putting out the flame completely.

  “Haha!” came the witch’s voice from inside the house.

  Nina, Ivy and Van Helsing all ran forward to Oswald’s side, Nina cradling Izzy in her arms. The black cat didn’t like being held and, realising it was home, struggled and jumped down to the ground before darting around to the side of the house.

  “Is that you three again?” came a friendlier, female voice from the crowd.

  “Sheila?” Ivy asked and, sure enough, out of the crowd stepped the kindly woman who had helped them earlier in the day. Except now she was carrying an enormous pointy stick that looked very much like it had once been a rolling pin.

  “Hi kids,” Sheila said with a smile. “You come to help?”

  “Help?” asked Nina.

  “It’s Halloween, remember?” said Sheila.

  “Yes?”

  “Well, we thought we’d take your advice and…”

  “Nononono…” Nina interrupted. “You’ve got it all wrong…”

  “But you said that we needed better weapons and the witch…”

  “No!” Nina snapped. “You can’t go around burning people to death. You just can’t. And anyway, this isn’t a bad witch, I think she’s misunderstood.”

  Sheila lowered her knife to her side. “Is this right, Van Helsing?”

  “Maybe,” he replied. Oswald gave him a shove with his nose. “Yes. Misunderstood.”

  “And besides that,” said Ivy. “Don’t you realise what happens when you set fire to sugar?”

  The crowd grumbled that it didn’t know.

  “Well I know,” said Ivy. “If you set fire to sugar it caramelises. And this is a house made of sweeties.”

  “Ah,” said Sheila. “You’re right.”

  Ivy nodded.

  Suddenly, the door of the witch’s house burst open and there, all green-skinned and brandishing her wand in front of her, was the witch. The mob of villagers gasped.

  “That’s what I’m talking about,” said the witch. “Never mind me throwing a Halloween party, I think now that I’ve got my cat back I’m going to turn all of you lot into…”

  “Erm, Belinda?” said Nina who had snuck up on the witch and was now pulling at her sleeve.

  “What?” snapped the witch.

  “Look at the time,” said Nina.

  “I haven’t got a watch,” replied the witch.

  Izzy came trotting out of the house and began rubbing herself against Nina’s legs and purring.

  “Stop that, Izzy!” Belinda the witch bellowed.

  The cat looked up at her and might have smiled, ignoring what the witch was saying as it continued to purr against Nina’s legs.

  “Does anyone have the right time?” Belinda sighed as she scanned her eyes left and right, trying to spot someone who had a watch. “No-one? Really?” She turned back to Nina. “Why do you want to know the time, deary?"

  “Because we’ll be stuck as monsters if you don’t turn us back before midnight,” Ivy said, getting louder with every word until, by the end of the sentence, she was shouting at the witch.

  “Oh yes,” said Belinda. “Forgot about that in all this excitement. But I can’t leave this lot out here, they might burn the place down.”

  Oswald gave a bark and bounded out toward the villagers.

  “You know, I think I can almost understand him now, maybe we don’t need to turn him back,” said Nina with a giggle.

  Oswald growled at her.

  “Only kidding!” Nina grinned. “You said something about a party. How about you wave your wand and set up the party for everyone out here.”

  The witch looked at Nina. Then she looked at the crowd.

  “Oh alright,” the witch said eventually. “A party’s no fun if you’re on your own, but you have to promise he’ll be here when we come back.” Belinda leaned over to Van Helsing and prodded her finger playfully at his shoulder. “You big hunk of handsome.”

  Van Helsing’s mouth moved up and down but no sounds came out.

  “He’ll be here,” said Ivy sweetly, then turning to Van Helsing she growled, “won’t you?!”

  Van Helsing nodded and tried to smile back at the witch.

  “Oh goody,” said the witch. She waved her wand and the clearing that surrounded her house burst into life with magical streamers launching themselves from tree to tree. Lanterns appeared to grow from the boughs of the trees and spilled multi-coloured light everywhere. Chairs and tables appeared before tablecloths floated down from the darkness above and all kinds of food and drink popped into existence like popcorn bursting from invisible kernels.

  The crowd gave an impressed “oooh” before a mist blew through the clearing and left behind the Halloween decorations. Spooky skulls and skeletons, a barrel of apples for bobbing and lots more besides. In the meantime the witch had been busily preparing the reversing spell in her scullery. But I can't really tell you all the details. You see, the spell the witch was casting was a bit dangerous and I don’t want any of the grown-ups in your house finding out I taught you how to turn someone into a dog. They’d probably throw me into the sea if they found out.

  And so the witch had prepared the ingredients in her cauldron and as the clock ticked towards midnight she began to chant…

  “Spirits of the ground, spirits of the air,

  Rid us of the ghost and the werewolf over there.

  Take the vampire and make her go away,

  Turn them back to normal while it’s still today.”

  There was a rumble of thunder in the distance and the house shook.

  “Spirits of the sea, spirits of the borange,

  Now I come to think of it, turn me back to orange.”

  There was a flash of light and a noise that sounded like whurp ping! The children turned to see what was going on and as they did a pink mist flew out of the cauldron and zapped straight into them.

  Nina, Ivy, Oswald and Belinda the witch were knocked to the ground like pins in a bowling alley.

  chapter sixteen - what colour are witches?

  “Ugh,” said Oswald. “Are you alright?”

  “Oswald?” chorused the girls.

  There was a crashing of furniture as everyone blinked their eyes open once more.

  “Is everyone okay?” asked Belinda, whose skin was now a quite lovely shade of orange.

  “Oswald, are you okay?” asked Nina. “Can you speak? Are you a boy again?”

  Belinda went and opened a ne
arby cupboard. She took out some clothes.

  “He’s fine, he’s a boy again,” said Belinda. “But he’s a boy who’s in the nuddy now.”

  “What?” asked Ivy, stepping backwards and crashing into a chair. “I can touch things again! I’m not a ghost anymore!”

  “Well you see,” continued Belinda. “All that running about in the woods… even the magic only stretches so far…”

  “He’s naked?” asked Ivy.

  “Eew!” giggled the girls.

  “Luckily I’ve collected one or two things over the years. I’m sure these will be about the right size. Here you go my lad.”

  Nina put his glasses on the table and the girls turned their backs. They could hear struggling as Oswald pulled on the remainder of his clothes.

  “You can turn around now,” he said once he was dressed.

  The girls turned around to see their Oswald. All in one piece and pushing his glasses up his nose once more.

  “I have to ask,” said Oswald. “What does ‘borange’ mean? When you were saying the rhyme you said ‘borange’.”

  Belinda shrugged and waved her wand in the air. Sparks flew from it, landing in Izzy’s black fur as she rubbed against her mistress’s legs. “It has to rhyme. I had to get something to rhyme with orange. Nothing does.”

  “I have two questions,” interrupted Nina.

  “Yes?”

  “One – ‘orange’ rhymes with ‘orange’. Why not just say it twice?”

  “Oh, I suppose I could have. Well, maybe next time.”

  “Two – why do you want to be orange?”

  “Well, what colour do you expect me to be?” cackled Belinda. “Red?” She roared with laughter.

  “So all witches are orange?” asked Oswald with genuine interest.

  Belinda shook her head. “No, not all of them. But all women with orange skin are witches.”

  There was a rustling in the woods out the back of the house and Oswald spun around to see what was making the noise.

  “Did you see what it was?” asked Ivy, a little nervously.

  Oswald was frowning. “I think…” he paused, wracking his brain. “I might have seen your Uncle Bill, Nina.”

  “We have to go,” said Nina in a panic. “Belinda. Thank you. Be nice to the villagers, enjoy the party and don’t cast any nasty spells. Do you promise?”

  Belinda nodded, then stared through the opposite window at the party that was unfolding out there. She gazed at Van Helsing and took her lipstick from a drawer.

  “Oh I promise,” she said, puckering her lips and painting them bright red with the lipstick. “I thought I saw romance in my tea leaves the last time I read them and now my heart is a flutter for that hunk out there.”

  “Riiiiiight,” said Nina. “Not sure we need to know more than that. Don’t want to have to wash our brains to get rid of any horrible memories now do we?”

  Belinda wasn’t listening. She was near the window blowing kisses at Van Helsing who, for some reason, seemed to be blowing kisses at the strange orange woman staring back at him.

  Nina threw open the back door and the three children ran out towards the woods at the back of the house, but the moment they stepped out of the clearing and into the woods a cloud passed over the moon and they were plunged into pitch blackness. Out of nowhere leaves and soil from the forest floor began swirling around them, faster and faster it spun, getting thicker and thicker until, with a thunderous bang, everything stopped and everything went dark.

  chapter seventeen - back to the lost bookshop

  When they opened their eyes the friends were back in the hidden room in the Lost Bookshop. Books were scattered all around them like leaves fallen from book trees.

  “I forgot to check,” said Ivy eventually. “Did the witch turn you back to normal or not, Nina.”

  Nina pretended to lunge over to bite Ivy’s neck but gave her a hug instead. “I think I’m cured,” she said.

  “Look!” said Oswald. He held up a book. A book called ‘The Witch With the Glitch’. On the cover were a whole host of fantastical illustrations, but in the middle was a witch, half green, half orange, and next to her were three children. And each child cast a different shadow. One shadow was in the shape of a ghost, another a vampire and the third a werewolf.

  Both Nina and Ivy reached out, touching the old cloth of the cover and flicking through the pages, before Oswald placed it carefully back on the shelf they had chosen. Their shelf in the hidden room.

  “Nina? Ivy? Oswald?” a voice called from somewhere else in the bookshop. It was muffled, far away, but unmistakably Nina’s Aunty Ann.

  The children slipped out of the hidden room, locking the door behind them and dashing into the corridor.

  “You three been busy?” Nina’s Uncle Bill appeared from somewhere. “Did you get all of those books sorted out I asked you to?”

  The three friends nodded.

  “Good,” said Uncle Bill with a smile. “Now go and find your Aunty Ann, she told me she was making hot chocolates with marshmallows in. You don’t want them to get cold, do you?”

  “Noooo!” Ivy and Oswald raced off down the corridor.

  “Thank you,” Nina said, giving her Uncle Bill a big, beaming smile. “I love it here.”

  Uncle Bill nodded and smiled, took his glasses off and rubbed them on his sleeve.

  The two of them said nothing for a moment. Uncle Bill put his glasses back on and pointed at the floor.

  “You dropped something,” he said.

  Nina looked down at the floor and there was a set of false plastic vampire teeth, the kind you slip over your own teeth to pretend to be a vampire.

  “I’ve just thought of the best prank,” Nina began, but when she looked up, Uncle Bill had gone.

  Nina grabbed the teeth and, giggling, put them into her mouth before running off after her friends.

  No-one else knew about the adventure they had in the hidden room in the Lost Bookshop. No-one in the world.

  But the children knew. And I know. And you know.

  And Aunty Ann and Uncle Bill?

  Well, you never know what they know.

  More Lost Bookshop Adventures

  It’s a different, exciting adventure with every visit to the Lost Bookshop so if you liked ‘The Witch With The Glitch’ why not check out…

  The Mystery of the Missing Monkey

  The children find themselves transported to a tent backstage at Cornelius’ Circus Spectacular. All is not well in the big top and Nina, Ivy and Oswald are soon caught up in a mystery the likes of which they had never dreamed…

  With the big finale looming the children must investigate the circus performers, from Wallace the Lion to Sadie the bearded lady and from the monkey crew to Doctor Dick the duck. And if they can’t find the missing monkey?

  Well they’ll have to perform in the finale themselves of course!

  Who is to blame for the disappearance of the monkey? Will the children learn the ways of the circus in time to perform in the finale and even if they do how will they get back to the Lost Bookshop again?

  Check it out now:

  Amazon US | Amazon UK

  The Search For The Sheriff’s Star

  When Nina, Ivy and Oswald step into the hidden room in the Lost Bookshop they find themselves transported to a saloon in the Wild West and looking down the barrel of the rotten Rude Robbie’s gun.

  They quickly find themselves caught up in a plot that threatens to demolish an entire town. The children know they must help and, with the aid of a little Indian girl named Wachiwi, they set off to save the town in The Search For The Sheriff’s Star.

  Will they find the fabled treasure in time to save the town and if they do will they ever find a way back to the Lost Bookshop? Read on and join the fun in this children’s cowboy (and cowgirl!) adventure!!

  Check it out now:

  Amazon US | Amazon UK

  Thank You

  Don’t worry, you haven’t stumbled into a h
idden chapter of the Lost Bookshop, this is just the page where I take the opportunity to thank a few people who helped in the process of this book being sneezed onto the page.

  As always, bringing a book to life takes a lot of hard work so I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who helped.

  Dale Maloney whose covers just get better and better.

  Sam Hartburn and Elaine Jinks-Turner for being phenomenal co-editors without even realising it.

  Brenda West, Oliver Kinsley and Sarah Howard for beta-reading the living heck out of the book and telling me when I spelled things wrong and when I was using gibberish instead of sentences.

  To my wonderful wife Eve whose encouragement and love is the fire under my creative butt. In a good way.

  Lastly thank you to the real Aunty Ann and Uncle Bill - owners of the finest fictional bookshop in the world.

  About the Author

  Adam Maxwell lives with his family beside the seaside in Northumberland in the UK. He spends most of his days in the attic and sometimes throws pebbles at passers-by. He has written a number of books for adults including the Defective Detective series. This is his second book for children. That is if you don’t count a picture book app ‘I Don’t Like Spiders, They Walk On The Sky’ he collaborated on. If you like this book there’s every chance he’ll write some more.

  If you’d like more information on Adam a good place to start is his website www.adammaxwell.com where you can also see more of his fiction for all ages.

  If you keep visiting his website he may consider a cessation of pebble-throwing if you wave at him there’s a good chance he’ll wave back.